Sentence deciphered

Okay, from now on every time someone says something that's completely incomprehensible and hard to understand, I want you all to post it here and we'll try and figure out just what the hell it said or was trying to say.


[07:47:41] @ Florian Un Deux the Third : &m talk that freaks you out\you are willoing tpo be with dragon whose s$

if the answer is given in chat then put the corrected version in spoilers

Spoiler:

Needless to say I predict a lot of them will be from Florian. If you want though you can always post sentences from other places as well. Anywhere there's grammatical slaughter

I have one, by yours truey.

Quote :

[21:06:45] @ AkaNeko : Gh, mys ebletday

Spoiler:

[00:53:13] @ Florian the Pikachu : bith my character are bassed of sneak


Translation:

Bitch my characters are boss in sneaking

[00:03:42] @ Florian the Pikachu : i gotta boot thios game up to sww what the hell im the editor to see what im missing


Slightly Rephrased:

Spoiler:

[00:36:48] * Scotia doesn't really need a goqhi35

Spoiler:

[22:01:53] @ Florian : not fir ne uts trent thats interested

best I can do with this is: not for me but Trent is interested

Big Sis: appsernyu cpuson.wad akypinh evetyong pny skype sayong.o.eas on frugs
Translation: ..... ............. I don't even know, I give up!

it says Apparently Finni was skyping everyone on skype

[09:52:55] @ Florian : i meant the rest of thevimafes
[09:54:14] @ Darc : theimafes?

[09:54:31] @ Darc : Surely, you mean the images?
[09:54:40] @ Florian : yeah

TRANSLATION

Florian wrote:

i shoukd but my phone diesnt ha e enohgh room

I should but my phone doesn't have enough room.

[17:06:01] @ J : mehaslo/ st a lot of things on this computer since then because this computer fails at not beingbrok en

Also being broken but yeah, still not difficult...

that doesn't look too good for me then huh?

Been wuitte3 tired

Spoiler:

Don't ask how I messed up that badly, I still don't know.

But that's not even close....

"thiun lively the chat has been in way to longs is like the least"-Spanish inquisition 2014.
I have no clue as to what i said here.